Me (left) & Carla (right) just before I went to Australia
It’s the 1980’s. First week of high school. I’m a scared little mouse, entering one of the biggest schools in the country. And this time EVERYONE’s taller than me.
I sit in the queue, waiting for my turn to rehearse my Leon Schuster piece for the Empangeni High School Initiation Concert.
“I need some more neon plastic bangles for our act,” I hear her say next to me, “otherwise no one will believe I’m Kylie Minogue!”
I turn around: “I’ve got some! I’ve got LOADS!”
She looks at me, a little stunned.
The scared little mouse reveals her Colgate smile: “They’re neon pink, green, orange, yellow… EVERYTHING! You can borrow them for your act!”
“Really?” And I get my first glimpse of the biggest Chestshire cat smile I’ve ever seen in my life. A smile as big as mine? This MUST be fate!
“Yeah, of course, I can bring them tomorrow!”
I get called up for my act.
Afterwards we get divided into our classes. Nervously I enter my new class. There she is, my smiling Kylie! So confident!
She comes up to me: “I’m Carla!”
The scared little mouse takes leave, and in its place a new tigress emerges: “I’m Rochelle”.
That night I wrote in my diary: “I should be so lucky.”
21 February 1989: (1 month after the concert)
She gives me a letter with “PRIVATE” written on the outside of it.
I open it.
“I think we should be best friends.”
It’s hard not to hoppity-skip back to her, as I try to contain my excitement within my cool, casual Saturday Night Live stroll.
“Thanks for your letter.”
She looks at me expectantly…
“You KNOW the answer! OF COURSE!!!”
She throws her arm around me and drags me to the tuck shop: “Come, we HAVE to go and get some chocolate to celebrate!”
“Great minds think alike,” I laughed.
Every year, on the 21st of February, we each have a slab of chocolate – preferably Nestle’s Top Deck, as that was the original choice of that day (and, we couldn’t really make up our minds between brown or white, so we got something that had both!). No matter where we found ourselves in the world, when the 21st of February came, it was chocolate time!
21 Years. Wow, our best-friendship had become an adult! But with that, she had to leave me.
So, what WAS it about this girl that had me and the rest of the world mesmerised, fascinated and captured within her colourful world of spontaneous laughter and never-ending enthusiasm?
Why, for 21 years, was SHE the one I’d think of EVERY single day?
To continue with the theme of 21, I give you 21 reasons of why she melted right into my heart – a little glimpse into her colourful past – and, hopefully, you’ll be able to recognise many of them as why you’ve also come to love her so much– to celebrate her Carla’ness.
Caissie, this is for you:
21 Reasons Why I Loved Carla So Much (read out numbers loud)
- Because you thought only “husse met lang ore” lie on their backs with their legs up against the cupboard, while laughing out loud from their stomachs (I guess that made us expert “husse” then!)
- Because you also thought we were going to be “discovered” every time we walked down Wildebeest Street and belted out all the songs we knew from the 80s.
- Because you reinforced my love for classic Afrikaans songs, teaching me all the words to “Sprokies vir n Stadskind”, which you’d play on the guitar and sing with me in many concerts at school.
- Because you thought learning “I just can’t get enough” from Depeche Mode on the piano was a classy thing to do, especially while wearing shocking-pink braces and wide, little denim mini skirts and performing it in front of the WHOLE school (WHILE SINGING ALONG…)
- Because you thought I was the most hilarious person on Earth, in fact, SO hilarious, that we’ve managed to fix your jaw when, after careful smiling because of the pain of your post-wisdom-teeth operation, you BURST out laughing and so clicked your jaw into place!
- Because you held my hand as I woke up after my wisdom teeth operation, and you didn’t let go when I squeezed it harder and cried like a baby. The cherry on the cake was when you had that can of Coke ready to wash down my blood and take away that post-wisdom-teeth-operation taste.
- Because you made your sister also make me a matching paisley shirt for our school disco.
- Because you gave me a haircut, and even though the bob was skew, said I looked totally kiff.
- Because you’d go to the office with me and also get wacked with his cane when Mr Venter didn’t appreciate our obvious boredom in his history class.
- Because you also had a soft spot for surfers and so helped me make up a little song about them, complete with dance moves, which we, of course, ended up performing in front of a lot of people…AGAIN! (This time at the Landsdiens camp).
- Because whenever we got really worried about something, you’d always take my hands into yours and pray WITH me.
- Because you’d jog past the Empangeni boys hostel with me just as they were always queuing outside for their dinner.
- Because while we were in university, you’d be there at your hostel’s phone booth at 9pm every Sunday night for three years to either answer my calls or call me.
- Because while we were still in university, you’d write me a 20+ -page letter almost every 3 weeks, answering ALL my questions from the 20+ -page letters I’ve written to you, AND with extra information and questions for me! It made me feel so incredibly interesting, like I really mattered, even during that dark time when I thought I didn’t matter at all.
- Because you gave me my first cell phone (which was a bit broken because somehow you got melted chocolate inside of it) because you wanted me on standby every time we had something to share.
- Because we called each other with not just good news, but with bad news also, regardless of what time it was.
- Because when I had a fight with my boyfriend, you said I could come and stay with you and Robert AND bring my 2 cats along, even though you had new and fancy suede couches that they could scratch into pieces.
- Because you jumped into a car with me to go and spend New Years Eve in Ballito, even though we had no idea where we were going to sleep or wash our high-maintenance blonde hair. We slept under the stars that night, and Robert was our bodyguard.
- Because when we decided to get ourselves Doc Martens, you wisely advised me NOT to get them in black or oxblood, but rather in a unique colour. So in the end you got the green ones and I the cherry ones. And needless to say, you were right – they were a hit!
- Because you were the first one to call me a writer when you spent R110 and bought me that brown leather-bound notebook, with me going: “But I’m not REALLY a writer.” With you replying: “Yes, you ARE, so here’s a start.”
- Because you loved me so unconditionally and endlessly, more than I did myself. You taught me to believe in myself and celebrate my idiosyncracities. Because of you, I stayed real, and proudly established myself as who I am today, Rochelle.
I could give a 100, no, a 1000 more reasons why I cannot imagine a world without my dear Carla, because she was so much a part of it.
To end of, I’d like to dedicate this song to you by Julian Plenty. It’s called “Fly as you might.”
I am here but to give you my best
Stand by your side while you rest
‘Cause you’re my girl
‘Cause you’re my girl
I will provide for you best
I’ve always liked you the best
Fly as you might
Fly as you might
I will support you through this
I’ll hold your hand while you rest
‘Cause you’re my girl
‘Cause you’re my girl
I think my deeds will attest
I’ve always liked you the best
Fly as you might
Fly as you might
I’ll love and celebrate you forever, Caissie.
With “pampoenliefde”
Your Shellie,
forever.
